Happy New Year!

I must say, I'm so very glad 2009 is in the past. The best thing about 2009 was, of course, my baby girl, Elizabeth Rose. There were a lot of struggles that had to be gone through last year, a lot of painful changes that were made, and a lot of things I want to simply leave in 2009. I'm hopeful that 2010 will be a year of growth (hopefully not too painful), healing, and, well... change. That's one thing we can depend on - every year will be filled with change. In one form or another, change seems to enter every year. Sometimes with a bang. Like this year. I should be off to another country within the next couple of months. I'll be learning to live in a place where I'm not even close to fluent in the language spoken there. I will be leaving nearly everything and everyone I know behind. Yes, change is here and I welcome it. Okay, not really. I want to welcome it and to feel adventurous, excited, and trusting; but I don't. I'm working on it, but with change I tend to dig my heals in and fight it a bit. Most folks can't always see that with me, because I say the right things so as to help them (I want them to feel like I'm living my dream and not to worry about me), but inside... I'm a bit afraid. This is big and "secretly" I hope something comes up and it doesn't work out. I'll probably even be a bit disappointed if it doesn't work out (I've focused on it so long) and yet I could live without this big of a change... I think. I want to do what's right and maybe this move is right, but maybe it's not. And maybe it will just be another thing to live through. Another thing to praise God I make it past. None of us know what the future holds and that can be a bit daunting at times. I'm going to try and trust God to take care of directing our paths and taking care of us as we travel no matter where our travels take us.

Happy New Year!